Anonymous asked: i think you should give up on batman..if it hasn't happened now. it probably won't. just saying.if he doesn't miss you as much as you miss him. come on girl think about it. even if his feelings changed try to be friends, you may never know that connection could start over again if it got damaged. heads up from (not real name) jams

Aw. No need to be Anon. I don’t bite. Much. Usually. Unless you’re into that… ;D Haha. Okay, on a serious note, I might as well use this as an opportunity to update you all. I get asked a lot about what’s going on. 

Yeah, I see your point. I’ve been wondering if his feelings have changed. I just saw him a few weeks ago, though. I talked to him today. He’s never said anything. I’m not going to assume feelings have changed. So until he says otherwise I’m going to assume he still likes me. I probably (again, not going to assume) do miss him more than he misses me. That’s my fault though. I fell way to hard way to fast. I think he misses me just the right amount. I think that he does truly wish he had more time for me. I think he feels bad things couldn’t be the way we want them to be right now. Hell, last I heard he wasn’t even having meaningless hook-ups with other girls. If that’s not the perfect man I don’t know what it! I think for what we are right now he’s handling things way more right than I am. 

I can’t lie, if he told me he didn’t like me anymore I’d be crushed. It’s hard enough to not officially be his girlfriend. I’d be completely heartbroken if he said he didn’t like me anymore. I’d go through the usual breakup emotions (even though it wouldn’t technically be a breakup).  I’d cry and be really sad. I’d probably be a little angry too. But if me and “Batman” don’t work out as boyfriend and girlfriend I would definitely want to stay friends. He’s a really great person. I made that mistake with “A”. I pushed to hard to be his girlfriend and now after 6 years we don’t talk at all. “Batman is a great person and I am VERY lucky to have him in my life. Part of me is terrified that if we do date it’ll ruin the friendship. Well, part of me WAS terrified. I’ve thought about it and I think we’re close enough, trust each other enough, care about each other enough, and understand each other enough to not let things go bad between us. I do think we’d make a really good couple too. Like, the perfect couple. I’d never stop talking to him if feelings changed. That isn’t fair at all. I’ll be heartbroken, but time heals all wounds. I’d eventually be okay. If we’re meant to be it’ll find a way. 

So, yeah, I see your point. I won’t give up on him though. Unless he says something along the lines of “Diana, I don’t like you. Get over me. I just want to be friends.” I won’t give up on him. If he was some asshole that was just playing games with me I’d say you were totally right. He has very legitimate reasons for not wanting an official girlfriend now. The distance would be a bit hard for him. (I’ve already had long distance relationships. They’re fine with me but I can understand why they aren’t for everyone.) He isn’t THAT far away. It’s about an hour. He’s just so busy with school he doesn’t really have time to take the trip. He’s also busy with other stuff. He needs time for other friends too. He’s young and wants to enjoy college. He doesn’t want to have to worry about hurting a girlfriend back home if he decides to get drunk at a party. I told him that as long as he didn’t have sex/oral sex/anal sex/whatever else you can do with another girl I wouldn’t be mad. I told him that drinking was fine with me. I told him I didn’t even care about him dancing with other girls. I can see why he’d feel bad though. I understand all his points and I respect his decision. I do hope he decides/wants to make us official soon. I do like him a lot. 

All the friends I’ve told in real life (which is 3 people) have said the same thing. They say the situation sounds “fishy” and that I should just move on and forget it. Some have even gone as far as calling him a lying douchbag. They say he’s probably just using me for sex. That doesn’t make any sense at all though. I don’t know. Usually I’d agree with them. I just…I don’t know. I have a good feeling about him. My gut and my heart are both telling me he really is as good of a guy as I think he is and that I should wait for him. Ya know? 

The night “Batman” told me he liked me I called up certain guy friends and told them we couldn’t talk anymore. Me and these guy friends..we’re…there’s..”things” there. Uhm. Not to sound like a slut but they want to bang me hard. I never thought I’d be tempted to cheat on “Batman” or anything. I just felt weird talking to them “while I had a boyfriend”. So I told them to back off a little. I barely talked to them after that. They were upset enough I wouldn’t hook up with them. Now they were upset I didn’t want to really be that close of friends either. Than Batman told me he wasn’t really looking for anything just yet. Things continued as thought we were together enough that I still shouldn’t talk to those guys. So I didn’t. Than we started talking less and less because he’s really busy. (Which I’m not mad about.) He always said we’d date when he got a car. Well, he got a car and we aren’t together. (Which I’m not mad at.) Just like he wants to have fun, so do I. I started talking to those guys again. I’m still not going to hook up with them. I’d still feel really bad if I did that. I know it wouldn’t be cheating. I just personally would not feel right doing it. I’m friends with them again though. It just shows that I’m understanding what me and “Batman” are to each other better than before. Ya know? I’m still only going to sleep with “Batman”. 

Sometimes I get upset. Sometimes I think that maybe I’m being stupid. However, if I really sit down and think about all the times we’ve talked, all the things he’s said to me, and all the things he’s done for me, I really truly believe he’s a good guy. The “clues” just don’t really add up to say anything negative about him. I know I write a lot on here, and the few friends I told know a nice chunk of it too, but no one knows more than me and “Batman”. We’re really the only ones who can judge. Ya know? 

So, point is, I do see your point. I’m not giving up on him though. I like him way to much. I don’t want to give up on him. I’m willing to wait. I really believe that he’s worth it. When you find something this good you don’t just “give up on it”. 

I mean, don’t get me wrong. When I say I’m not mad at him that doesn’t mean I don’t care. I care. I wish we were dating. I wish he had more time for me. I wish he’d pick me over other things. But I understand that’s not how it works and I accept that. Ya know? 

Uhm. So. Yeah. I think that’s everything. 

Oh, and also, I’m on my period. So for the next 10 days or so I’m going to be all crazy and emotional. So if he goes 30 seconds without talking to me I’d probably write a post about how he ignores me and shit. Not literally, but you get the idea. A few hours ago I tried to pet one of my guinea pigs and she ran away. I burst into tears and cried hysterically for 5 minutes and insisted that I was a terrible person and all animals hated me. So..yeah. Just keep that in mind when I write “he doesn’t like me” posts. Just..ya know..throwing that out there.